How many people do you know who are happy with their current work-life balance?

Not many, I bet.

Work-life balance has become the elusive holy grail of the post-Covid world.

Only the rare few are achieving it (and even then, we’re questioning whether their Instagram stories are real).

Here’s the 3 most common problems with work-life balance.  Do any sound familiar to you?

Mistake #1: Treating work and life as two separate things.

Let’s get one thing straight: You can’t have work without life, and you can’t have life without work.  Human beings are pre-programmed to work.  Its what we do.  Work is our way of contributing to the world in which we live.  Work is life, and vice versa.

If you can accept that work is an important part of your life, you’ll start finding ways to be happy.

Mistake #2: Thinking that balance is a destination.

Many people talk about trying to achieve a state of ‘work-life balance’, like it’s a destination to travel to.  When you get there, you’ll be happy.  “Ah, I’ve finally achieved work-life balance, now my days will be filled with fun and laughter”.  I’m sorry to tell you, that’s not how it works.  Work-life balance isn’t a destination, it’s a skill.

Think of work-life balance like a ‘balancing act’ in a circus. There’ll be times in your life when you lose your balance or drop some hoops.  This is normal. You’ll get back on your feet and carry on.  Will you lose your balance again?  Sure.  Will it be the end of the world?  No.  The balancing act of life is what makes things interesting.  You wouldn’t pay to see a circus performer if they only had to balance one hoop on their arm, would you?

Mistake #3: Searching for the work-life balance blueprint.

How many self-help books have you read about wellbeing or happiness?  How many YouTube videos have you watched about achieving goals?  How many chats with friends have turned into ‘what’s the meaning of life’ conversations?

There’s nothing wrong with any of these things, but the problem is this: you won’t find the answers you’re looking for.

There is no ‘how-to’ guide or blueprint for the perfect life.  If there was, we’d all have a copy and we’d all be happy, right?  Believe it or not, the answers aren’t in a book, or online, or in the wise words of your best friend…. The answers are within you.

Living the life you want

If you want to be happy in life, you must design the life you want, and then go and get it.

I know, I can hear you saying, “if only it were that simple!”.

I didn’t say it was easy.  You might need to put in a few hours. Do some tough thinking. Maybe have a few chats with a trusted friend.  But if you really want to be happier in life, you’ll get there.  The life you want is within reach, believe me.

Here’s a few questions to help you get started:

What does work mean to you?  What are the top three reasons why you choose to work?

How important is it for you to enjoy your job?  Give it a number from 1 to 10, where 1 is not important at all, and 10 is extremely important.

Do you prefer to have boundaries between times when you’re working and not working (e.g. Working 9-5 Mon-Fri with evenings and weekends off), or do you prefer to work flexibly whenever the work needs to be done?

Imagine your 7-day week as a pie chart.  You have 168 hours in the week.  Split the pie into these categories and decide how many hours you’d like to spend on each (you can draw the pie if you like): 1. Sleeping. 2. Eating, exercising and self-care. 3. Leisure (including hobbies and interests). 4. Paid work (e.g. a job), 5. Other work (e.g. housework, childcare, etc).

What’s stopping you from living the life you want?  Identify up to three things.

Name one small thing you could do today that could move you closer to the life you want.